I’m searching for a personal god, preferably of the muscular, Greek sort, though all interested parties may apply. Smiting, pointless edicts, and contradictory “holy book” passages are definite turn-offs. I’d also prefer that you not have issues with my using your name in vain, especially in bed (what else are we supposed to yell?).
Me: smart, cute, and somewhat jaded. I must say that after searching for years, I’ve found as little evidence of your existence as that of the elusive “perfect man”. People have tried to tell me that perhaps I’m just looking for you in the wrong places (apparently, gods don’t frequent bars, nightclubs, or street corners), but this becoming a bit ridiculous. Relationships are a two way street. No offense, but I feel like I’m doing all of the work here, so if you’re really interested, you’ve got to be willing to at least show up.
